Friday, April 29, 2016

If They Only Knew

Just when I think I have nothing to write about, we do another seminar and dealing with all those people provides a new story. If they only knew.

So, part of my job is to do a reminder call the night before the seminar. I usually end up getting a bunch of voice mail answers. The messages are mostly all about the same, but yesterday there was one that belonged in a creepy movie. I’m going to tell you what the recording said, but you’re going to have to fill in the tone of voice. It was slow and deliberate, and totally serious.

“Roses are red, violets are blue. Sugar is sweet and so are you.” Her the voice changed and became ominous. “But the roses are dead and the violets are rotten. Maybe I’ll call you back (pause) unless I’ve forgotten.” All that was missing was a witchly cackle at the end.

Tonight, the people I called yesterday were to show up. When I make the phone calls, I make notes of the answers I get. Next to this woman’s name I had marked down creepy voice mail. We were running a little late, so a crowd had gathered before I started checking people in.

Most of the people were patient. One woman budded ahead and tried to check in first. I had her wait with the others, but when it was finally time to check everyone in, she still tried to get ahead of the crowd. No surprise, she was Miss Creepy Voice Mail.

She was wearing a hat, some knitted number meant for colder weather than we were having,strange fitting jeans and a disgruntled expression. Later as I was collecting the response sheets we give out, she and her husband got into a nasty argument. I steered clear of them. Little does she know that when I went back out to my post and my yellow pad of paper, she just became a character in the new thing I’m working on.

Next Tuesday is release day for SEAMS LIKE MURDER. Tell your friends! Also my website is updated. Check it out.

Thursday, April 28, 2016

What Color is your Filter?

A few years ago, my husband took some videos of me walking my dog to send to her hip surgeon, who practices in Idaho. Tasha, although limping, looked like her normal gorgeous self. I never looked worse. My voice sounded like two pieces of Styrofoam rubbing together, and my “rear view” was considerably more panoramic than I would have preferred. My Facebook friends assured me that the camera added ten pounds (I hoped it was twenty) and that my perception of my appearance was distorted.

Of course, they were right. Distorted perceptions are part of the human condition. Before we are born, the filters of our minds are clear. Unclouded, if you will. But as we mature and experience life, our minds become conditioned. The yoga teachings equate that conditioning to seeing the world through one of three quartz crystals.

The Smoky Quartz Crystal. The mind that sees through a smoky quartz crystal perceives the world as darker than reality. The Debbie Downer of minds, for all of you Saturday Night Live fans. In my smoky quartz crystal mind, my rear end grows larger; my voice, more screechy; my dog’s limp, more pronounced. The smoky quartz mind is prone to depression, anxiety, and negative thinking.

The Rose Quartz Crystal. The mind that sees through a rose quartz crystal, on the other hand, sees the world as more optimistic, colorful, and charmed than reality. The Pollyanna of minds. Seeing through a rose quartz crystal inevitably results in disappointment. We ignore risk and postpone appropriate action. If I saw that same video through a rose quartz filter, I might missed my dog’s obvious pain and not taken action to help her.

The Clear Quartz Crystal. The mind that sees the world through a clear quartz crystal sees things as they are. No better, no worse; no attachment, no fear. When we experience life through a clear quartz crystal, we are grounded enough to see the truth without being derailed by it. We experience life as it is, in this moment, free from the conditioning of our past.

Most people think yoga is about stretching your body.  Yoga's true purpose is clarifying your mind. What color is your filter? If your answer is anything other than looking-glass clear, yoga can help.


Tracy Weber

books available

PS--all three books in my Downward Dog mystery series are now available!  Learn more at  Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Inundated by Biscuits

How am I inundated by biscuits?  In a good way! 

I'm referring to my Barkery & Biscuits Mystery series.

The first one, BITE THE BISCUIT, was published last May.  And now it's nearly May again, and the second in the series, TO CATCH A TREAT, premiers soon--officially on May 8.

Meantime, I'm still not quite through with the rough first draft of the third in the series--title to come--and won't finish it till I return from Malice Domestic, although I hope to find time on my trip this weekend to work on editing what I've written so far.

Plus, I just signed a contract for two more books in the series.  More Barkery & Biscuits!

In the meantime, there are also more biscuit issues.  I'm not much of a cook but my Barkery books each contain a dog treat and a people treat recipe.  I've been talking about some people treat ideas with a friend who's supplying recipes, but still need to work out the dog treat.

And in case you're not aware of it, can you guess the name of my protagonist Carrie Kennersly's dog in the Barkery & Biscuits Mysteries?

You got it.  Biscuit!

Monday, April 25, 2016

Early Tuesday Entry

Well, it’s been a long while since I wrote something for my blog, mea culpa entirely.  Things have been spiraling out of control for awhile but I’m now trying to take the reins back into my hands.  Hard to believe this has been going on since the end of March!!  And I’m still bedridden, still sick, still suffering complications.

I thought things were straightening out last weekend when I kept an appointment with my infectious disease doctor who totally blindsided me by announcing that she was putting me back into the hospital because I was in renal failure.  Funny, I didn’t feel sick.  But I sure was, spent a very interesting hallucinatory night dreaming of fountains.  I was released two days later, advised to drink lots and lots of fluids.  So I brought a twelve-pack of bottled water with me back to the nursing home, along with a twelve-pack of Atkins chocolate shakes (eat protein!) and I’ve been drinking and drinking until I get the all-clear on my kidneys.

One mistake I made was thinking I was getting better more quickly than I really was and found myself on the floor of the bathroom late Friday night unable to rise – “help, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” is a joke until it’s you on the cold tile floor, having neglected to follow instructions to press the red call button and wait for help.  They give you a sedative and bring in a complex rattling canvas contraption that they can push and lift and press and tilt under you, and you find you have more arms and legs on you than you thought – it’s like you’ve grown a knee out your nose and where did that elbow come from? - until suddenly you are lifted gently into the air like a circus act. Amusing and embarrassing.   But I promise now to wait now for assistance.

I have finished the notated ms of Knit Your Own Murder, and it should go in the mail today.  Look for it in August.

Meanwhile, check with the Hopkins Public Library web site to see what time I will be there tomorrow, April 26, to give a talk on being a sick mystery author.  Ellen thinks I should cancel, but I’m going to try to make it.  I’ll be groggy but with a good enough hat I should be able to carry it off.